Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Snow storms and gun fights

Item one: I don't mean to come off as a snow-snob, bragging about how awesome I am because I learned how to drive in the winter-wonderland known as Hillsdale, Michigan, but you'd think Vermonters would be a little bit savvier about driving in the snow. Granted, it's Storm City outside right now, but everyone, and I mean everyone, completely freaks out when it snows around here. And we live in the freaking mountains. Seriously, people. The Mountains.

Now I've never had snow tires on any of my vehicles, so I've had to learn how to drive, you know, correctly, in the midst of snow and ice. And basically, there are three simple rules for staying out of the ditch:

  1. Break sooner than usual / but not so hard as usual.
  2. Accelerate slower than usual / with less gas than usual.
  3. Don't overcompensate with the wheel when you start to slide.
And basically, that's it. I just solved all your problems, Vermont. You can thank me later.

Item one end.

Item two: There was a shooting three blocks away from my house! This is better than Chicago! And it was over the reefer, usually a "safe" drug. Seriously, the dealers around here are idiots. I could own this town in under a year.

Damn my ethics!

End item two.

No comments: